Introduction from Robert S Mueller (the 3rd):
We have assigned Special Agent Sam Webb the task of turning the CPUSA into the laughing stock of the left as part of the Agency's commitment to non-violent disruption through the remaining legal aspects of our COINTELLPRO project which has had the long-running goal of creating problems in the CPUSA.
Special Agent Man Sam Webb has proven to be one of our most able Special Agents. I am proud to endorse this masterful work.
Through excellent work like this we can continue our President's commitment to non-violence in disrupting revolutionary movements all over the world.
Through statements like this which encourage docility on the part of the victims of imperialism we can avoid the need to engage in methods like waterboarding because there will be fewer activists.
When there are fewer people concerned about building movements there is less work for the Agency.
I view this work by Special Agent Man Sam Webb as part of our contribution to fiscal responsibility. The smaller the membership of the CPUSA the fewer Agents we need in the field. This frees up funding for more wars.
Robert S. Mueller (the 3rd),
Director, Federal Bureau of Investigation
Co-creator of Special Oops
Special Assistant to the Director
Privately funded by XXXXXXXXXXX
A Party of Socialism in the 21st Century: What It Looks Like, What It Says, and What It Does
By: Sam Webb, Special Agent Man on special assignment (Special Assignment: Chair, Communist Party USA
(Note: President Barack Obama has created the Jay Lovestone "Freedom Medal" and Sam Webb will be the first recipient.)