Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Bruce Bostick and mental illness


I have called this special meeting to clarify all the rumors about a great leader of our Party and a very special asset to my important work of transforming our Party at this historic juncture during this epochal moment of great transition to President Barack Obama's "Wonderful World Society," a great labor leader and all around leader of the democratic people's movements---

Bruce Bostick has been one of the mainstays and a pillar of support for our President, Barack Obama.

You have all read on the AFL-CIO blog the posting by our dear friend and Comrade, Tula Connell.

Bruce used this friendly interview with Comrade Tula to explain the circumstances surrounding his recent emotional stress and mental illness resulting in his inability to function in his capacity as a leader of the United Steelworkers Union. Bruce has undergone electric-shock therapy and is presently medicated.

Let me assure you that I have complete confidence in Bruce Bostick and his ability to lead our Party.

Bruce's depression and mental illness is not something we want to put on our masthead but we don't want to duck this problem either. We are fully behind full rights for people with these kinds of problems brought on in their struggles against the Minnesota Problem.

Let me tell you, Comrades; in my struggles against the Minnesota Problem my head has been spinning more than once. My head is screwed on straight now as you can see from my excellent video presentation that was lively and spirited where I took on all comers. I held my own after popping a few Prozacs.

Bruce, share those pills with the rest of the National Board members. You got a big bottle full there. That's it, pass the bottle around.

Jarvis, pop a handful. Scottie, Scottie, don't make a pig of yourself leave a few for others.

There, are we all mellowing out now? This is better. We can put the Minnesota Problem behind us for a few hours.

Take it easy. Read the People's World. Post a few comments in support of my articles.

While you are feeling good read the economic analysis by John Case. Don't read a lot or it will bring you back down into depression. We don't need Tula blabbing to the entire world that none of us can hold down jobs because of our depression.

When you see Bruce moping and looking for agents, please give the teddy bear a big hug; you too, Erica--- give the big guy nice big hugs.

You know, the way I feel now I am confident we have this Minnesota Problem whipped.

Yes, Jarvis, what is it?

Sam, you might want to check out what's being blogged here before you start getting overly confident. We might have to put off changing the Party name at the upcoming convention.

Can someone get me Kamran Heiss or Kamran Heiss, Junior on the secure phone... looks like we are going to need another hand.

Somebody, somebody; let's get a little help over here picking Bostick up off the floor. Take anything he might hurt himself or us with away from him... keyboards, pens, pencils, paper.

Jarvis! Jarvis! no, no... let him keep the razor blades.

What next?

Where would this Party be without me to keep all you nut-cases under control.

Make sure no one talks to Tula Connell about the mental illnesses anymore. At least don't tell her you can't work because the Minnesota Problem drove you crazy.

Tula let Bruce off easy this time. She kind of didn't tell the entire story. On the other hand she told enough about the Bruce Bostick story for people to figure out what Bruce meant by saying he had all kinds of emotional problems.

Sam Webb
National Chair, CPUSA

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Sleepless nights and dreams of serenity

I have had many sleepless nights thinking through the logistics of our problem.

We want to get rid of this god awful name of CPUSA which is hindering our work. There is nothing I would better like to be doing then getting out among the middle class intellectuals and hobnobbing with the labor elite. I just can't do it with this albatross hanging around my neck. Once we get our name changed we can call a press conference to announce it. This will put us in good standing with the struggle by press conference crowd.

Yes, Jarvis; what now?

Sam, are we going to increase dues now or wait until after the convention when we have our new name?

Please Jarvis, I was trying to save the good news until after the convention.

For so long we have been trapped by this crude thinking being called Marxism-Leninism the result of uneducated workers thinking they can develop an ideology justified by a bunch of ultra-leftists thinking they can just take power whenever they feel like it even when they are not prepared.

We must go through many intricate stages to get to where we want to go. I'm not sure we want our objective to be socialism. Perhaps we do maybe we don't. There are many complexities to consider.

As Jarvis has pointed out there will be someone even better than Barack Obama after him.

Alright, I know that is hard to believe now as our beloved President Obama has demonstrated his sincere concern for the Haitian people. Humanitarianism just doesn't get any better. The marines have landed--- not with guns blazing, but concealed or shouldered. Imperialism has mellowed and has learned to become more people friendly.

Now let me mention our strategy as we move closer to convention. As all of you know I have not been able to contain the Minnesota Problem. We are trying a little different tact to see if we can't do better.

I have assigned Dan Margolis to go under-cover using the trekkie like name of Kamran Heiss. Dan's assignment is to convince all those using the Internet that one man and one man alone is responsible for all of our problems. We are claiming a united Party with our unity being disrupted by this one bad boy behind anything we don't agree with. People suck up these kind of excuses.

We have been quite successful in containing the ultra-right. Now we must contain the ultra-left.

Today I issue the order for all 230 members of the CPUSA to go after the leader of the pack of these ultra-leftists.

I have assigned Comrade Rick Nagin to quickly come up with a new name for our organization.

I have assigned Bruce Bostick to route out all remaining Stalinist agents.

Yes, Bruce?

Sam, I thought we were going to say that there is only one person causing all the problems.

Bruce, thank you for reminding me of my change in the Party line.

Yes, Bruce?

Sam; I have already exposed the one Stalinist agent. How can I expose the others if we are claiming only one person using many names is the problem. My deep understanding of dialectical thinking tells me we can not claim many people are ultra-leftists and then turn around and claim all of our problems result from one bad boy.

Bruce, I am going to study what you have said in order to determine if you are using scientific thinking.

Yes Teresa; what is it?

Sam, I am concerned that if you claim that their is but one ultra-leftists causing problems using many different names and monikers people are going to think the new PW only has one or two real readers.

Teresa, please pass me that bottle of aspirin. Why the hell did you have to throw this monkey wrench into the mix?

Yes, Scottie, what is it?

Sam, if you are so unhappy with the position of Chair; can I finally have the position?

Scottie, you are fortunate to have the position you do. Now, please, stop your whining.

Long live...

Long live....

Long live.....

Yes, long live our gallant leader Barack Obama.

Sam Webb
Chair of a dwindling CPUSA about to be revived in May by using another name.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Minneapolis Communists lead the fight for an end to foreclosures and evictions

I want to single out all of our fine clubs in the Twin Cities in Minnesota for leading the way by example in getting involved up to their eye-balls in the struggles of the working class.

This notice was placed in the on-line People's World:


Minneapolis: On M. L. King Jr. weekend foreclose the war, not people's homes!
January 16 2010 13:00 - January 16 2010 16:00

1:00 p.m. Meet at 38th Street and Park Avenue South, Minneapolis, for protest and bannering in front of the home of Leslie Parks, Minneapolis resident fighting to save her home from foreclosure.

1:30 p.m. Travel to an indoor program at St. Joan of Arc Church, 4537 Third Avenue South, Minneapolis. Doors open at 1:30 p.m. and program starts at 1:45 p.m.

Speakers include: Mel Reeves, Community activist; Leslie Parks, Minneapolis resident fighting to save her home from foreclosure; Hip Hop from Sketch the Cataclysm; and others.

Sponsored by: the Iraq Peace Action Coalition (IPAC) and the Minnesota Coalition for a People's Bailout. Women Against Military Madness (WAMM) is a member of both coalitions.

Info: Call the Anti-War Committee, 612-379-3899; Twin Cities Peace Campaign, 612-522-1861; or WAMM, 612-827-5364.

We have been meaning to keep readers updated on this struggle for a number of months but we just haven't had the time.

I want to single out our finest members active in the fight to stop these foreclosures and evictions who are known and loved by the working class:

Professor Erwin Marquit who provided the ideological understanding for quick action.

Mark Froemke the remarkably active labor leader in the Minnesota AFL-CIO who promises to bring out Shar Knutson the President of the AFL-CIO. We can't afford to risk the arrest of Mark Froemke at this time but Mark assures me that he will be in this struggle with every bit of his spirit.

Janet Quaife who is known as the rock providing the leadership of the all-people's front led by Barack Obama.

Peter Molenaar who has earned the nickname, Viagra, among the masses.

Doris Marquit who is trying her darndest to get posters made: homes not bombs.

Harry McAllister is the leader of the pack. Harry has assured me that no stone will be left unturned and Sheriff's Deputies will have to remove him if they want to padlock this home.

We are into this struggle up to our necks for the long haul; we shall not be moved.

I want to take this opportunity to call upon all of our coalition partners in the Twin Cities who we have worked with over the years to hang in here with us until victory or the day the bank decides to make a final decision because once the bank makes its final decision this is a "done deal."

Should eviction take place we promise to work for a larger majority of Democrats in the Minnesota State legislature.

We Democrats will not sit by as bankers foreclose and evict people from their homes. No sirree. We are going to help the bankers find a way to collect insurance to cover their losses so the home can be sold at a substantially reduced price to the next buyers. It doesn't matter who lives in a home just so the home gets lived in. We aren't going to stand out in the cold too long over this issue but I want to assure everyone summer is a coming. Summer may not come quickly in Minnesota but summer will come. And when summer comes we will be looking for every opportunity to campaign for R.T. Ryback for Governor. R.T. is our coalition partner who is four-square against evicting people from their homes. R.T. can't come out and say where he stands because first we have to get him elected Minnesota's next governor. After R.T. is elected I can promise you these foreclosures and evictions will be halted. R.T. will do for Minnesota what President Obama has done for our country. Make no mistake; take it from me. Things are going to change when R.T. Ryback is elected governor.

I promise that if this eviction is carried out I will do everything in my power to gather our forces in unity for the largest press conference in Minnesota history.

I pledge our Party's full and determined support to all those who have been evicted from their homes.

I will see to it that each and every victim of foreclosure and eviction has their name permanently placed on the People's World web site.

Forward to victory!
Follow me into struggle!
Power to some of the people!
Partial victories are at hand!
In militant solidarity with Leslie Parks!
Sometimes the people will not be defeated!
Leave your buttons, leaflets, red flags and posters of Karl Marx at home!

I want to thank one other very brilliant and remarkable theorist on economics and the dialectics of tactics and strategy of middle class struggle; the one and the only very lonesome hobo, John Case. Many people in the Twin Cities do not fully appreciate the fact that John Case has shared his wisdom with the people of the Twin Cities on numerous occasions. John shared his visions about what to do about saving the St. Paul Ford Twin Cities Assembly Plant and he has put his same resourceful and creative mind to work in helping Leslie Parks save her home. As a result, we should witness similar results.

For the National Board of the CPUSA

Sam Webb
National Chair, CPUSA