Sunday, November 8, 2009

A letter from the leader of the democratic people's front....

Friends and fellow members of the National Board of the CPUSA and our two esteemed guests, Bruce Bostick and Mark Froemke. It is with great pleasure that I announce to you that I have received this letter from our dear friend and colleague; the leader of the democratic people's front and the President of the United States of America--- Barrack Hussein Obama.

Some people get letters from Robert Borosage; I get a letter from the President of the United States for serving him as my Lord and Master.

Yes, Scottie, amen is right and quite appropriate for our Sunday morning "Hour of Power" brunch.

This Sunday morning we have much to be thankful for. Not only do we honor our Lord; we thank Barack Obama for seeing his way to allow us sinners to work at his side.

As you are all aware, our entry with the all new class-free People's World got off to a rocky beginning and our struggle to cleanse our soul of the Minnesota Problem has been more difficult than Mark Froemke trying to shake off the evil temptations placed before him by the bartenders as he petitioned for support of this historic Health Care Reform.

Bruce Bostick! Bruce Bostick! Zip up those trousers right now. This is our Sunday morning "Hour of Power" brunch. I will have none of that in here. You do that at your computer while you are watching your kiddie porn.

Yes, Erica; what is it?

"Sam, Bruce should have the right to do that in here. You are discriminating against him."

Please, please; can we maintain a little decorum during our Sunday morning brunch.

As I was saying; we have received this letter from the leader of the democratic people's front, Barack Obama. I am so, so proud of all of you. I am sure not many people receive such a letter from Barack Hussein Obama.

Think about it; our country has made tremendous strides. We have elected a president without a birth certificate. This is a tremendous step forward for our country. Our leader is ageless.

Let me get to the meat... "Bruce, not that meat!"

Ok, let me get to the heart... "Elana... no, no, not your heart."

Bruce, you zip up right now; Elena, you button up immediately.

Ok, let me place this another way.

Let me focus our attention... "Scottie, what is it?"

No, I am not going to focus on the Minnesota Problem right now Scottie. I told you to take care of that problem. Next time do what you are told.

Where was I. Thank you Jarvis. Yes, the letter from the leader of the democratic people's front...

Goddamn it... Jarvis; do you have to snivel and cry every damn time His name is mentioned? Ask Bruce if you can use his handkerchief.

What do you mean his hanky is sticky? Bruce; I told you to wait until you got back to your computer.

Jesus Christ... Mark, what is it? No, you may not open your beer bottle when I am speaking.

Ok, Mark, finish your beer and give the bottle to Bruce when you are done. Ok, give the bottle to Erica if she wants an empty beer bottle so bad.

What kind of people am I working with here at this ministry?

Are you all a bunch of social misfits or what; you can't even sit here and let me read the letter from the President.

I want no more interruptions... Mark, you finish the beer... give the bottle to Erica when you are done so she can do her thing, Erica you pass the boittle to Bruce so he can fill it and Bruce you hold on to that bottle and when you are done there you give the handkerchief to Jarvis.

See, this is called "organization." We communists are known for "organization." Don't believe me well just ask Danny Rubin there. He organized his way out of having to work his entire life by living on the dues of our members.

Yes, Danny, what is it?

"Sam, you are a very good organizer, too."

Ok, ok, all of us on this National Board have our special little abilities we combine to give our Party the strength to serve our leader, Barack Hussein Obama.

Now, the letter... Jarvis, for crying out loud you are assigned to assist Dan Margolis in writing his next article for the People's Voice... Jarvis, I don't care if that is all you have been doing is helping Dan write his articles, you just keep on helping him and you and the Lonesome Hobo are doing a good job, too.

I'm just going to read this letter all of you do what ever it is you want to do.

Bruce, I am not going to tell you again; at least cover that thing with your hanky.

Ok, here we go...

Sam --

This evening, at 11:15 p.m., the House of Representatives voted to pass their health insurance reform bill. Despite countless attempts over nearly a century, no chamber of Congress has ever before passed comprehensive health reform. This is history.

But you, the Communist Party USA and millions of your fellow Organizing for America supporters didn't just witness history tonight -- you helped make it. Each "yes" vote was a brave stand, backed up by countless hours of knocking on doors, outreach in town halls and town squares, millions of signatures, and hundreds of thousands of calls. You stood up. You spoke up. And you were heard.

So this is a night to celebrate -- but not to rest. Those who voted for reform deserve our thanks, and the next phase of this fight has already begun.

The final Senate bill hasn't even been released yet, but the insurance companies are already pressing hard for a filibuster to bury it. OFA has built a massive neighborhood-by-neighborhood operation to bring people's voices to Congress, and tonight we saw the results. But the coming days will put our efforts to the ultimate test. Winning will require each of us to give everything we can, starting right now.

Please donate $5 or whatever you can afford so we can finish this fight.

Tonight's vote brought every American closer to the secure, affordable care we need. But it was also a watershed moment in how change is made.

Even after last year's election, many insider lobbyists and partisan operatives really thought that the old formula of scare tactics, D.C. back-scratching and special-interest money would still be enough to block any idea they didn't like. Now, they're desperate. Because, tonight, you made it crystal clear: the old rules are changing -- and the people will not be ignored.

In the final phases of last year's election, I often reminded folks, "Don't think for a minute that power concedes without a fight," and it's especially true today. But that's okay -- we're not afraid of a fight. And as you continue to prove, when all of us work together, we have what it takes to win.

Please donate to OFA's campaign to win this fight and ensure that real health reform reaches my desk by the end of this year:

Let's keep making history,

President Barack Obama

Bruce, when you are done can you get the janitor and ask him to frame this letter to hang on my office wall. Tell him to bring a frame, hammer and a long enough nail to hang it on my wall.

Yes, Bruce, what is it?

"Sam, you can't nail this letter to your wall."

Bruce, here in this office I am the boss. Why can't I nail this letter to the wall?

"Sam, your walls are glass."

So, what is your point Bruce?

"Sam, the point is that if you try to nail this letter to your wall it will crack."

Oh; ok, Bruce; I knew we kept you around for some reason. Thank you for explaining that to me.

"Sam, sometimes I wonder about you. You are brilliant in many ways. But when it comes to common sense you must have been standing at the end of the line when that was passed out."

Mark, before you leave back to Minnesota... can you explain to me how you were able to participate in a nominating convention in Minnesota while you were registered to vote in North Dakota... let's go over the details, there are a couple other states we should try this in. If we can't get in through the front door we can get in through the back door.

Yes, Bruce?

"Sam, you can get all that information from my videos."

Thank you Bruce; I will write that down. I can't keep all the small details in my head.

Ok, folks; this concludes Sunday brunch.

Sam Webb
National Chair,

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